


forever

by sedirktive (orphan_account)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Marriage Proposal, like i guess i talk about bleeding and wounds and stuff but theres no actual violence or injury, sort of violent imagery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-07
Updated: 2014-08-07
Packaged: 2018-02-12 04:19:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2095545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/sedirktive
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>and suddenly you know what you want || a proposal fic i wrote when inspiration came around and kissed me full on the mouth and dedicated to everyone who is or has been or will be in love</p>
            </blockquote>





	forever

**Author's Note:**

> sometimes we all just fall in love really hard

_forever is a long time_

thats what you think to yourself anyways

well it goes without saying that forever is a long time

but when you really think about it forever is a long long time and so is infinity

when you recite the words in your head again and again you feel a little weak at the knees because youre promising him forever and forever is a long time

your fingers grab the fraying edge of your shirt and let the old stitches pass under your worrying fingers as you look out the window at the passing scenery and trees that disappear from your line of sight before you can follow them with your eyes

its like trying to grab onto the scenery

like ripping it from that exact moment in time

and clutching it with cold and sweaty fingers to your chest

tattooing it into your skin

like you might never ride this bus (uncomfortably squashed next to some person who smells a little too strongly or looks just a little off) to his house again and watch these same trees streak away into the distance ever again

and you need some sort of _in memoriam_ just in case

so you burn yourself with these feelings and emotions and carve them into your heart

you watch the things you engrave bleed nasty thoughts because youre worried worried worried

not about whether you left the front door unlocked or the oven on though

youre worried about what happens if it turns out infinity is too long for him and hes not sure he wants it from you

what then

you leak tarry insecurity and it pools around your feet and threatens to submerge everyone around you on the route 168 bus to maple valley thats somehow holding you and all your worries plus all these goddamn people

its up to your neck when you almost miss your stop and tug the signal chord with frenzied force

you barely feel yourself moving as you ghost off the bus and down the sidewalk

its only when you finally get the key in the lock of 21605 fir drive maple valley washington 98038 that you realize you didnt leave your body on the bus and theres a box in your pocket and youre-

youre doing this bro youre making this happen

when you open the big white door to johns house (no its technically your house too now- youve lived here three years now and papabert has flown the nest with his upper middle class earnings and moved to socal or something and you have to keep reminding yourself) you lose your voice

no thats not exactly it

your voice turns on its heel and throws itself back down your throat in an attempt to hide or maybe choke you

you swallow it

okay voice old buddy you can take it from here you just hide with any semblance of calm collected thought because you can take it from here

inhale

“hey john im back”

right right take off your jacket and throw it on the couch like you always do

act natural

“hey, dave!”

his goofy face with those eyes so blue that the ocean could go green with envy and that big grin that flaunts a chipped tooth to anyone paying attention (its not the marianas trench by a long shot but its noticeable if you look closely) and that fucking rats nest on his head emerges from the doorway of the kitchen and okay your brain just went mia on you

maybe it eloped with your lungs because youre not sure you can breathe anymore

“hope you don’t mind me reheating yesterday’s dinner and then just throwing together some salad tonight,” he says as he approaches you and

and

and

and suddenly you know what you want

you want him to sometimes be so tired he cant cook but still cares enough to throw together some leafy greens in a bowl and call it a salad

you want to wake up every morning with this asshole complaining that he wants coffee so you go and make it for him (standard coffee with just a bit of creamer and two teaspoons of sugar)

you want him to accidentally wash reds in your white clothes sometimes so that you can be annoyed and then apologize until he noogies you and promises not to do it again

you want him to hold you in his sleep even though he puts his coldass feet on you and wakes you up at asscrack o clock because he loves you even in his sleep

“john”

your body doesnt move but his stops mid-hug

“yeah, dave?”

fuck

try again

“john”

“yes, dave, that’s my name.”

“no shut up im”

you clear your throat and hes looking at you with that expression decorated with upturned lips and those eyebrows someone makes when theyre amused and confused

conmused

amfused

shit youre sidetracking

you drop to your knee (ow) and grab his hand

you stare at the hand and run your thumb over it before you look up at him

“john”

“oh.” he says softly as his features soften into something that makes your heart swell with memories of every kiss and every fight and every night together and every night without each other

“i love you john and”

“and”

“and”

he waits patiently for you to fight down the tears and collect yourself and breathe goddammit he even waits for you to fucking breathe

you press your lips to johns hand and murmur

“and i want to be with you forever”

you take the ring box out of your pocket and its no longer heavy with weight or fear or anxiety

he cries when you open the box

“john egbert will you marry me”

the word yes never sounded so good in your ears

and even though the ring is a little too big for his finger

even though when he basically throws himself onto you for a kiss he pushes you to the ground

even though youre both crying

you think to yourself

_maybe forever wont be long enough_

 


End file.
